Where Do You Live?
On a rainy Monday morning, I was awakened by a knocking on the door. There on my welcome mat sat a box patiently waiting to be opened. I cradled the parcel in my arms puzzled at the unfamiliar handwritten address that eerily resembled my own writing. A pair of scissors ripped through the top, and I shuddered as I recognized the contents. I had naively thought that I had disposed of these items, and yet they had found me once again.
I delicately placed the brown box before me, and a shiver went down my spine. The hairs on my arms came to attention, but at the same time I felt a comforting familiarity. Crumpled papers were soon revealed. I removed each one, and noticed there was one word written per sheet. REJECTION…DEPRESSION…LONELINESS…DESPAIR…JEALOUSY were removed one at a time, and at the bottom of the carton sat a beautiful glass case. The card affixed to the top simply read…Hello Old Friend. As I lifted the lid, I came face to face with MY FEARS. I closed my eyes and prepared for the soothing isolation and complete paralysis that comes from allowing my fears to take hold of my spirit. What If I just try them on and see if they still fit? They traveled all this way to find me…the least I can do is have a short visit.
For years, I dwelled in the desolate land filled with nothing but heartache and misery. The landscape was littered with mistakes, missed opportunities, and regret. Seeds of hope were never scattered, so nothing lovely was allowed to grow. For some sick reason, I embraced the pain. I allowed it to have complete control over every area of my world. The role of victim suited me, and life continued to give me a variety of reasons to stay put. Slowly, over the past 5 years, I had started to climb out of the pit of darkness. My circumstances had not significantly changed, in fact some had even become more difficult. However, a resilience had formed that allowed me to breathe in the midst of hardship.
In an instant, strength surged through my body. The scattered papers were quickly tossed into the box, and in permanent black marker I wrote…I DON’T LIVE HERE ANYMORE! I am not sure if I will ever be able to fully escape my fears, but I certainly don’t have to welcome them into my home and offer a comfortable chair. Pessimistic by deep conditioning and nature, every single day I must stay on the road of passion, love, gratitude, and laughter.
We can choose who we travel with, and where we will live. Look around at your surroundings…is it time to move?
